HULK SMASH CONSOLE!

[The Curmudgeon]

Time to travel back a few years (OK, a lot of years) and discuss those old-school video games that really SHOULD have been fun to play but were so fucking difficult all you ever saw were the first few levels.

As always, it's our friends at Cracked that start the ball rolling..

www.cracked.com/article_15696_the-10-most-irritatingly-impossible-old-school-video-games.html

Damn, Empire Strikes Back. I only tried this a few times at a friends house and quickly gave up. It was just too damn hard. I think all of the Snes Star Wars games were impossible, even though I was reliably informed they were superb. (I think Jedi was supposed to be the best one).

This wasn't a console game, but the arcade game Vigilante was just fucking impossible. It started off OK enough, but it always ended the same way - one guy would come from the left, one guy would come from the right, and then you would be sandwich dry-raped until you fell off the edge of the earth. Never thought I'd write that sentence.

Any other games that caused you to crush your control pad into dust?

[Mrs_C]

I had the Turtles game for the Atari ST. can't remember it being that difficult though.

Here are a few I frequently lobbed my controller at the screen because of.



because this freaking level would prevent me from completing my favorite game of all time!





Try and get over that without dying. imagine it. You have battled through 8 worlds without a warp whistle and you have no 1ups left No power-ups and no stars. Consider yourself fucked.



Ignore the gash graphics for a second. The idea behind this game is to destroy enemy bases on islands, take them for yourself or leave them neutral. The choice is yours. Basically there are about a 100 islands and I never got past the first one because the computer was too good. (please remember I was of ages 9-14 and I don't think this game was meant for my age group) Maybe that was part of the problem. Anyways check it out.



So Blue is friendly, green is neutral and red is enemy. I wish my map looked like this when I played but as I explained it never did. Oh I wish I didn't suck at it.



I spent hours playing this little nugget and i owe my love of Sim games to it. However the problem was that to effectively "complete" it, you need to have your city reach a populous of 500,000. Sounds fair? You would be wrong. You see out of 999 different maps they all have some sort of water on it. To build a functioning city you need as much space as possible. There is 1 map that has no water so you would imagine this would be a place to start. Again. No. You see to achieve the populous needed you pretty much need every residential, commercial and industrial zone filled to capacity and as much of it as possible needs to be high value to encourage more to move in. Water is the biggest factor for this and with no water you are looking at ghetto after ghetto and no-one wants to live there as the crime puts them off. So therein lies the problem. The most I ever got was 400,000 odd.

Now it can be done apparently and this chap has managed it quite nicely.



What a dick.

[trashcanman]

I think I've done this rant before, but this the face of pain.



Seriously fuck those games.

The first level was always this really awesome super-fun beat-em up
and then every level after that was a new horrible exercise in pissing you the fuck off. It was two players, but if one died, you both did.
And with the game being as hard as it was, friendships were literally ruined from the frustration of the co-op in this game.