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Post by trashcanman on Sept 28, 2011 21:08:17 GMT 2
Now here's an idea for an article. Assembling a team of fictional characters to rid the world of the inevitable zombie plague. www.ugo.com/tv/best-zombie-apocalypse-teamCan't really argue with any of that. I have got to applaud that lineup. But they clearly missing one clear ingredient. The team's fearless leader. I nominate:  |
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Post by Ben on Oct 3, 2011 7:00:35 GMT 2
Right as I clicked on page 3 to see their number one choice, I thought to myself "Too bad they didn't pick a Predator." Sick list, Trashcanman.
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Post by The Curmudgeon on Oct 3, 2011 15:22:50 GMT 2
Yup, not many people are gonna argue with that list. A Predator would be an awesome choice, but would they class brainless, stumbling creatures as enough of a sport to attack them in the first place? Gotta say though, if I were in a zombie apocalypse and I had the entire world to choose from, my first and most obvious pick would be this guy;  He can't be hurt, no puny zombie is going to bite him, he can fly, he can blow them apart with his eyes, if we're surround he can simply pick me up and run past them into another fucking country in seconds, and if I DO happen to get bit, he can just fly around the world so fast that time goes backwards and I'm still alive. Beat THAT, Wolverine. Supes aside, though, (and would guys like Batman and Superman kill zombies? Even if they're already dead?) I would have three far cooler picks. First, back in the world of fiction..  Dude can stop world wars in under a DAY. Imagine what he would do to a zombie outbreak in a week. We'd be back driving cars, listening to the radio and watching TV in a fortnight with this guy. And also  Call him Snake. No-one fucks with this guy. Or maybe Jack Burton. Hell, just give me Kurt Russel. And we can have anyone? Really anyone? OK, first choice goes to..  Those undead cocksuckers wouldn't stand a chance. |
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Post by trashcanman on Oct 3, 2011 20:50:38 GMT 2
Nice picks.
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Mrs_C
Bad Witch
"I wipe my ass with your feelings"
Posts: 283
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Post by Mrs_C on Oct 4, 2011 19:03:31 GMT 2
No No No You have it all wrong.... See any of these last 3 picks could technically be turned into a zombie. I nominate any of these  He is already dead and can give you a funny quip in a bad cockney accent.  and I don't care what anyone says. No-one is gonna fuck with Johnny 5. He also lies he is not really alive (hence the involvement in zombie killing).  Wasps really are Satan's creatures. Imagine if there were giant wasps.... they could end anything even zombies. Finally  How about the worlds fattest cat? HE CAN KILL THEM WIF HIS HOOJ PAWS!!! |
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Post by Ben on Oct 4, 2011 19:05:28 GMT 2
Jack Bauer is a grand choice. For a less obvious pick, how about all-pro linebacker Ray Lewis? The man is a machine on the football field, tracking down opposing running backs and quarterbacks with uncanny speed for a man his age. And he's already killed two people in real life. Imagine what he'd do to the undead.  |
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Mrs_C
Bad Witch
"I wipe my ass with your feelings"
Posts: 283
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Post by Mrs_C on Oct 4, 2011 20:59:56 GMT 2
no footballers aloud!! Especially if they look like this  this  or this  Not unless he is planning to fight them off with his stoopid hair style. |
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Post by The Curmudgeon on Oct 4, 2011 21:17:56 GMT 2
I'm no expert on either sport, but there is a world of difference between our preening, pampered "oh, he bumped into me! The AGONY!" footballers and the huge running walls that the US call footballers. I don't know who that guy is that Ben was talking about, but fucking LOOK at the guy. He would break Beckham in half. If I were being attacked by a group of zombies, that beast ploughing through them would be mighty welcome.
Spike is a decent shout, actually. I'd go for that. And Johnny 5 was designed to be a war machine (I fucking LOVED when his eyes went red and he went into attack mode), so once you got the playful BS out of him.. wait, am I talking about Johnny 5 in a zombie movie?
I'd prefer a zombie outbreak to ANY wasp, small or giant. At least that big fucker couldn't get into a car. A wasp in a car. You tell me a greater terror than that.
I would pick that fat cat, but let's be honest, it really doesn't have long for this world anyway.
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Post by trashcanman on Oct 4, 2011 23:33:32 GMT 2
American football players are the toughest motherfuckers on this planet not actually killing people. Even Brock Lesnar admits that training with and matching up against those guys is tougher than cagefighting. Oh and shame on me (and them) for forgetting video games. Here's some picks:  Motherfuckers have chainsaws on their machine guns. 'Nuff said.  Frank West. He's fought zombies. Lots.  No description necessary. And, of course, anime. Omnipotent, sadistic vampire dedicated to wiping out his fellow undead? Check.  Monster-hunting nun and her indentured demon servant? Check.  Speaking of indentured monsters.... |
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Post by Ben on Oct 5, 2011 7:57:50 GMT 2
Some of the guys in the NFL are scary as all hell. This piece of work fractured his eye socket on Sunday and CONTINUED TO PLAY.  Holy. Shit. I could probably assemble a whole zombie apocalypse team of footballers alone. Throw in some UFC guys and it'd be absolute chaos. Another obvious addition: Terrell Suggs, teammate of Ray Lewis from my last post. Imagine the two of them ripping zombies in half with their bare hands. It's like a comic book, except real life!  If we're going with video game characters, though, Sergeant Cortez is my man.  Good old Timesplitters. |
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