The Curmudgeon is a big ol' racist.

[The Curmudgeon]

Yep. Sorry about that.

Sorry, was that news to you? Are you surprised? Well, hell, it was news to me, too. But I had a genuine black guy tell me just that on Facebook, in one of the more surreal but highly enjoyable net adventures I've had in a while.

Back story first. This one involves wrestling, and I don't know if you know this, but a lot of folks who do talk about wrestling online are, well, kinda dumb. Amazing that such a high-brow sport (cough) attracts such a low brow audience, but them's the facts.

Anyway, a black wrestler called Kofi Kingston had a match with a 450 pound beast called the Big Show. The Big Show destroyed him in about 15 seconds. So on the way home from work I was browsing through various Facebook pages, this one designed for WWE discussion. And I saw this, from a guy calling himself "Timaris", and the following is pretty much verbatim, but I've removed a lot of pointless wrestling chatter.

WARNING: this post is HUGE (and took me fucking forever to make, but it's funny and serves as a comment on how some members of society see themselves). It also involves Mrs C for a little while.

Timaris: Why they do Kofi like dat? Uncool had to turn it off

Me: Kofi Kingston deserves no better.

Mrs C: Kofi kingston is DAF (dull as fuck)

Me: Kofi Kingston is a serial rapist. Possibly.

Mrs C: Of Koala bears!!! He probably rapes koalas and eats their eucalyptus!!!!

Timaris: Hmmm I think I know the answers to this one but what's ur beef with Kingston? Since he don't do dumb shyt you hate em? Am I right Or is it cause he black? I see a positive black high flying rolemodel, u see a boring black guy, good to see we on the same page

Me: Oh yeah, that's exactly what it is, Timaris, because he's BLACK. You judgemental fucking moron. Yeah, someone white doesn't like someone black just HAS to be because of their skin colour. You cretin.
Never mind the fact Kofi has had the same stale, boring gimmick since he debuted, has not progressed in any single way in five years. AND he rapes koala bears. That good enough for you?

Timaris: Noted, good to see america still has its kkk swag, Jim crow swag. Tell you what Joe bob, how bout you and you wife_sister wake up. Its 2013, don't nobodywho matter care about race. Grow up and shake my post.

Mrs C: Yeah thats it. Im a racist. Of course. What a dick. It cant just be cos he is boring, shit at promos, shit a commentary, not an exceptional wrestler (there are better wrestlers lower down the rosta) and boring. Oh wait i already said that. Probably because he is double boring!!!

Timaris: Look I like kofi, I don't care if you don't, I don't know you crackers, I didn't ask u to comment. I like wwe as much as you white people maybe more. Leave this post trolls

Mrs C: Hey martin luther king jr!! It was YOU who brought up the black card!!!! Fair enough if you insist why don't you go and rid wit yo nigaz and pick up some sick ho's cos they be supa fly yo feel? What a fucking retard!

Timaris: Yall attacked me, I don't know u, kofi cool with me when or lose. Like I said racism is dead yall relics man. Ok man yall right . Just stop talking good god. White is always right Listen I been watching this show since age 1, you don't like me or kofi cool. Okay good great the Fuck more you want me to say. Do I think yall racist yes, can you change that, no. end of post. My the should break into your homes and beat you. Thanks for your kkk post. Have a nice day And yes I am the great Dr. king. He lives in the heart of all black people.

Me: Hey, I'll have you know some of my best friends are black. Well, they're not exactly "best friends." OK, they're a couple of guys I know. I kinda cross the street when I see them, to be honest.

Mrs C: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! What a loser! I guess it would be a waste of time me saying that i am actually about as far from racist as you can get since i am clearly debating with some of limited intellect. But here goes
1. One of favourite wrestlers of all time is The Rock *black*
2. One of my favourite gimmicks was by none other than R-Truth *black*
3. Think one of the most talented and severely under-rated wrestlers is Yoshi Tatsu *japanese*
4. Cried when Eddie Guerrero died. * mexican*
Think you need to accept your own skin colour and maybe when you do that you might stop being so paranoid about the KKK. They dont burn folk on lawns anymore it is the 21st century man.

Me: But of course, if anyone dare criticise a black person they MUST be racist. Living in your tortured, "woah is me I'm black and you will apologise for it" world must be a joyless nightmare. "Hey, ever noticed the bins are all BLACK? Those racist fucks! Why are people scared of the dark..because its BLACK?" The world doesn't owe you an apology, Timaris, you dumb fuck. Quit looking for one. I think you owe us all an apology.

Timaris: Im sorry, yall some hateful, spiteful, ugly, racist ass people who gets off fucking with people about a retired post because I like kofi. I bet you likewhite folk shit, like John Denver, I don't go on yo John Denver or Kevin spacy page and talk Shyt to u. a friend of mines just told me you people do things like this for a living, look all I can say is stat in Washington state were there are no black people because if you come to Austin texas with that hate black folks attitude " they won't take kindly to yo kind around here" go head say all you like. My Pontiac white and my president is black bitches [...]te black folks attitude " they won't take kindly to yo kind around here" go head say all you like. My Pontiac white and my president is black bitches

Timaris: Yall won , you beat a black guy on his posted about his favorite two superstars. Kofi sucks, im a Dick and yall not rasict. Now will you two stop posting?

Me: Timaris - you told us your president is black twice. The burning question is - is your Pontiac still white? The people need to know.

I love the fact you say we're racist and then start trying to make racist jabs about us. But, of course, black people can't BE racist, can they? I forgot about that. Your ignorance and hypocrisy is staggering. But John Denver? Kevin Spacey? Did you fall down the stairs or something today? What are you fucking talking about? Do you hate milk because those racist, honky cows only make it white? Do you find it offensive that only BLACK clouds get rain in them? You must have it so tough. Stay strong. Fight the power. My sink is white and my Hulk is green, bitches.

Timaris: Ok dog honestly you won. You can stop posting, I understand were you and that lady were comming from, im enlightenEd!!! yall can leave me alone now. Again u told you won but just likea mitt Romney ass white person you are ill play Obama and put youin your place, first off motherfucka

I didn't post on yo way, its just good manners not to be disrespectful, you crossed that line first Second you singled out a super star that really as no reason to be hated, other than his skin color, you don't like him don't watch faggot Second!!! I told you, you won leave me the Fuck alone, if you want to do more then talk send me a friend request lets meet up and work it out. You won't do this soI tried to drop it , I tried to move on, oh Listen I cool now, I smoked a bowl, if you wanna keep posted keep going. But Ima make a new post and forget about yo rasict ass, you cool with that, ordo you want me to get ya bags too masta

Fucking prick I told you you won, why keep posting? You trying to start more shit but all you can do is talk. and all this hot air for what? Cause you indenial, cause what I said makes sense? Hit a cord? You went at kofi I asked why, yall got disrespect ful first, and yeah my life hard as Fuck felt alotof racism, so what you doing ain't nothing new fool The racism aunt Shyt new, you can leave the post dude

Fucking wrestling post, fuckers like you , always fucking it up for everybody. I made these post like 3 days ago. That means you had to go looking to Fuck with somebody, unless you gonna do something other then rap on facebook, what we talking about? My name us Timaris Weaver I live in Austin texas, yourmove

I told you who I am, were I live, add me as a friend and we can settle this otherwise you ain't nothing but another white man fucking with a black man for what he likes

Me: So by your retarded reasoning, if I think Zak Ryder is awful, does that make me racist against white guys? If I think Tensai sucks, do I hate fat people pretending to be Japanese?

If I hate barely literate, poorly educated, knee-jerk reactionary morons with a Titanic sized chip on their shoulder over the fact the World Is Racist Towards Them, does that make me a Timaris-phobe?

I just noticed you've tried to add me as a friend. Timaris, go home. You are drunk.

Timaris: All im saying is, you fucking wit me right? You got a problem with me? Add me lets finish this so I can roll a blunt and go on. I don't even be on post like this but if people want a free ass whooping I can help Yes you keep talking , im ready to make plans to beat a stupid rasict motherfuckas ass. Im done talking

Just leave the post or add me Either or man, I don't got time to be talking all night, I just want to do my good deed for the say and put some retard out there misery. I told you to leave, or add me. That's it no more talk

Me: Wait a minute, you're trying to add me as a friend so we can meet up? Are...are you grooming me, Timaris? Are you one of those pedophiles I've been hearing about? I'm afraid I'm going to have to report this. Monsters like you make me SICK.

Oh, Timaris. Poor, simple, ignorant, paranoid, hate-filled Tamaris. Discovering you has been the highlight of my day.

Timaris: Lolol you are a talker, one those guys beat up, I know your type, I use to stick up for freaks like you, you like to talk alot man, I can't do it. lol first all you know nothing about me, that's why I want you to add me, you will learn exactly who I am . Marine corps and all faggot

When you looking for a lesson on proper manners when posting or bloging in person add me. my sergeant major would be haply to help too

Me: Why would I want to add you so I can find out more about you? I took a look at your page and I came up with the following;

"Helo, mi name iz Tamaris. I am thick as pig shit. Da end lol."

Does that about cover it?

Timaris: Semper fi

Me: And what is it about people in the army being morons who can barely write a sentence? Are you too busy taking naked pictures of tortured prisoners and raping women to sit down and learn to read and write?

Timaris: Im not in the army faggot I said the Marine corps

Me: I love the fact I accused you of raping women and abusing prisoners and the one thing you took exception to was the fact I said you were in the army. Bless your empty head, Timaris. This is just too easy.

Timaris: good night. Look up semper fi. Man I can believe I fight for freaks like you,

For the record as bad as I want to smash your face with a rusty iron, I didn't mean it. Ucmj if you are scanning my blogs, it was a empty threat. I inboxed him a smoothed it out. No harm no foul

Me: Timaris certainly did NOT "smooth things out" with me, nor did he send me any messages to my inbox. The man is a liar. Simple as that. An ignorant, paranoid, violent liar. Who rapes goats and films it.

FACEBOOK PAGE ADMIN: Stop Your Fuckin Fight An Leave!

Me: If you'll notice,Timaris was the one who started it. He made it about race, he called me a faggot on more than one occasion, he asked for my personal information and he physically threatened me. I did none of these things.

As responsible admins, I ask that you block this person from your page. Thank you.

Timaris: Did not mean any disrespect wwe universe. Im done. Im better than that, I respect the wwe too much do be doing stuff like this. My sorry , to all who seen this post

Me: Yeah, you should be sorry. You're a disgrace. Get off the Internet.

The End.


So, uh.. yeah. I went on his FB profile and the first sentence of his introduction was along the lines of "I'm black, therefore I'm a victim." Fuck that noise.

So - criticising a black wrestler when you're white makes you a racist now. Who knew?

So has anyone else come across someone with SUCH a huge, needless chip on their shoulders as this fucking douchebag?

[trashcanman]

"He probably rapes koalas and eats their eucalyptus!!!!"

Oh god, my sides! You two are fucking brutal. I think the poor guy didn't get your sarcasm. Surprised you didn't point out that you aren't exactly American seeing that one of his posts was mocking your racist American heritage. Also: The Rock is black? Hey, I like John Denver.....does that make ME a racist too? The best is when he starts lying about being a marine (most real marines have enough pride not to brag). That is what you call "the internet tough guy", and the correct response to such threats of online physical violence, for future reference, is as follows:

"What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your little miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you could have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo"

And as far as that guy accusing other people of racism when race is the first thing he thinks of:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_projection

[trashcanman]

Since this is on topic, I thought I'd post this here for Fortress consumption. It's a bunch f idiots on Tumblr relentlessly harassing some young lady who DARED post a picture of herself in a Native American headdress. Jesus FUCK where do people get off being so butthurt over fashion?










I wish I could have taken part in this discussion because as well as this woman responded to the intensely personal attacks leveled against her, there are plenty of rock solid reasons why that pic us not racist. First off, if a non-Japanese person dresses up as a samurai, it it racist? Is it racist for black people to wear a suit even though that fashion didn't originate in Africa? The only difference is that Native Americans underwent an unfortunate genocide -hence the sensitivity- that had nothing to do with any living person. Being offended by a picture is not going to make up for what America did to it's native people. Ever.

Also, it's interesting that people say that the headdress can only be worn by "warriors". So what exactly constitutes a "warrior" in present day Native culture? Do they let you wear it after you win x number of barfights or what? Should the iconography of the culture just die because the times have changed or should it be preserved, reformed, and integrated into the larger culture as a symbol of our/their past heritage? Either way, as much as I despise real racism, I think these fake racial crusaders leading online witchhunts against imaginary racists are just as bad if not worse. Oh, andd by the way, that girl has a picture up of her making out HEAVILY with a black dude. So she's prolly not that racist. Just took a picture of herself in an item she thought would look interesting. The filthy racist whore.

[Ben]

Oh God, this Timaris guy is trying to FIGHT racism? He's practically the poster child for the black stereotype!

Use of the letter "y" as an "i"? Check.
Accused white person who disagrees with him of being racist? Check.
Wanted to settle the confrontation physically? Check.
Repped his hometown as if it gives him "cred?" Check.
Brought up the fact America has a black president? Check.
Smokes weed? Check.
Had to smoke weed to calm down? Check.
Plans to smoke more weed later? Check.

Everything is there. Holy shit. The guy should cut his own hands off so he doesn't type this sort of shit again. He's CREATING racists with shit like that.

I was rolling my eyes at the armed forces thing too, except it IS entirely realistic that a Marine would take the most offense to being confused with the Army. The rivalry between those two branches makes cats vs. dogs look like nothing. However, this dude obviously isn't in the USMC. Not a one of them would be caught dead smoking weed while still in the Corps. Not even a hard nigga like Timaris.

[The Curmudgeon]

Trashy - No Doubt's doomed comeback's fate was sealed before a record was even pressed, when Gwen Stefani appeared dressed in an Indian headgear (and looking mighty fine at the same time, too). The promo video recieved so much negative attention from hand-wringing, politically correct morons that they pulled the vid before it could be officially released. Fair enough, it's No Doubt and they suck anyway, but I don't imagine they were expecting that sort of bullshit just for dressing up as an Injun. Whoops, I used a derogatory term. Scalp me. Whoops, shit. Again.

People do tend to get all self righteous and finger wagging when it comes to Native American issues. I actually have no idea why. Guilt?

Ben - I know. Part of me thought it must be a troll going after another troll, but a quick scan of his Facebook page shows he's all too real. Sometimes racist, offensive stereotypes come true.

[trashcanman]

Stefani has an annoying habit of co-opting other cultures, and she finally found one that earned her some backlash. No tears for her. She did the Hindu dot thing, then she did Harajuku Girls, and now this. I'm not saying she should be banned or harassed for it, but it does project an image of a privileged little white girl trying to appear cool and cultured by stealing other cultures for pop consumption rather than just being who she is. It's an annoying personal failing, but hardly cause for a PC shitstorm. And yeah, we have a thing called "white guilt" where people pretend SO HARD to feel bad about bad things that happened centuries ago that they harass people in the present day for petty shit. Pure overcompensation you can thank the media for.

[Ben]

To build on what Trashcanman said, the "white guilt" concept extends to all sorts of things you would never even think of. For example, most elementary schools are in the process of reevaluating whether or not push-ups can be assigned in physical education classes. From what I understand, quite a few schools have already banned push-ups because it makes the fat kids embarassed, or some shit. And then the same people who champion the fat kids and campaigned to have push-ups banned whine about childhood obesity and demand something be done to combat it.

[tim18]

ok i read the entire post. the author does come off very rascit. poor Timaris' seemed like the guy just wanted to rant on his favorite wrestler, you made short work of that. Timaris even apologized for the authors stupidity. i say give that black guy a medal for enduring such unnessary punishment. why were you attacking that guy anyway? over his favorite superstar? His being the key world. wow racism is in that post.

[tim18]

sad state of affairs when you attack verterns about there favorite things over skin color. i checked his back ground. he was in the 38th marine battilon on mirmar air base san diego. the guy who ripped the black guy for not being in was wrong. google Timaris Weaver. its the same black man

[trashcanman]

Hi, Mr. Weaver. lrn2sarcasmplz.

[Ben]

Well, Tim, I managed to decipher part of what you said and took your advice- I googled Tamaris Weaver to see if he checks out. What did I find? Mugshot, baby.

austinmugs.com/mug/timaris-weaver

Correct me if I'm wrong, but Timaris doesn't sound like a very common name to me (I think most of the time "Tim" is short for "Timothy"- just a hunch). Perhaps I found the wrong Timaris Weaver, but if this one is the same one from the coversation above, well... he certainly sounds like a great guy. Assault with injury. 3 weeks AFTER you got him all riled up, Curmudgeon. Tsk, tsk. I'm surprised no one has tried to hold you accountable.

[tim18]

May 9, 2013 20:14:49 GMT 2 Ben said:

Well, Tim, I managed to decipher part of what you said and took your advice- I googled Tamaris Weaver to see if he checks out. What did I find? Mugshot, baby.

austinmugs.com/mug/timaris-weaver

Correct me if I'm wrong, but Timaris doesn't sound like a very common name to me (I think most of the time "Tim" is short for "Timothy"- just a hunch). Perhaps I found the wrong Timaris Weaver, but if this one is the same one from the coversation above, well... he certainly sounds like a great guy. Assault with injury. 3 weeks AFTER you got him all riled up, Curmudgeon. Tsk, tsk. I'm surprised no one has tried to hold you accountable.

;

ok gentlemen this is the truth. im Timaris Lee Terriuno Weavers Father. Tim weaver. yes , he was attacked on the job by a drugged up teen. he is a youth concilor .im sorry for the miss spelled words and grammer .i use my phone as im sure he does. he not a blight 26 year old but he means well, he served well. i dont want to argue sir. you seem like a great guy. but have you been arrtested? ttraffic ticket? anything? probably yes right. dont judge this man until you understand the story. do your research. look him up. theres alot more about my son then him defending him self agasint a crazy teen. i do have a question sir, why are you picking on him? he said he was sorry. what more do you want. lol. hes a gamer and stoner, hes not even thinking of you. but he slander him. why?

[tim18]

i encourage you to friend him, face book, my space, whatever you kids use. get to know him. hes a hell of a guy. he likes kofi kingston , who is champ now by the way. my son has done alot for his country and even more for his family. He will make a great leader some day. im sorry he and i angered you. he thought he could express himself on face book and you shot him down for it. he doesnt do stuff like that any more (talking with him on fb now about this post)

he says he sorry for disrepecting you and you were right.

i challenge you to do this . befreiend my son. for two days . if you dont like him. by all means slander away. but if you do. if you do like him. write a positive blog about the experience. i encourage you and hope you do it.

not all black people are mindless ghetto beast. we just have big fingers and no fantcy sepll cheeck . opps spell check have a good day sir.

and anyone else reading about my son. hes not perfect. he made mistakes. but dont judge until you know the soul. look him up. the good out weighs the bad.

thank you for your time.

[tim18]

May 9, 2013 20:14:49 GMT 2 Ben said:

Well, Tim, I managed to decipher part of what you said and took your advice- I googled Tamaris Weaver to see if he checks out. What did I find? Mugshot, baby.

austinmugs.com/mug/timaris-weaver

Correct me if I'm wrong, but Timaris doesn't sound like a very common name to me (I think most of the time "Tim" is short for "Timothy"- just a hunch). Perhaps I found the wrong Timaris Weaver, but if this one is the same one from the coversation above, well... he certainly sounds like a great guy. Assault with injury. 3 weeks AFTER you got him all riled up, Curmudgeon. Tsk, tsk. I'm surprised no one has tried to hold you accountable.

(Timaris) for the record. i was drinking during the post with the author. hes not rascit i was mad he attacked me on my post. i dont know him, most peopledont attck random people on positive post.....but the authors is in different taste from myself. please Email me. [e-mail]. ill tell you everything you wish to know. i have nothing to hide. yes i defended my self, the kid attacked and he was on drugs. i put him down soft no first aid needed. i wasn,t arrested. i did a walk through with travis county police and paid my own bond. im currently winning the case and the civl suit soon to follow. i would like to be the authors friend and ask he take my fathers deal, he contacts me ill give him my number and my fathersnumber to en sure this is legit and im serious.

if your point was not to be kkk and all that noise. be my friend. be a black mans friend on your post ranting on him. that would show real american nuts.
and i stll like kofi by the way

[The Curmudgeon]

Man, go away for a couple of days and I come back to this.

So Timaris/Father of Timaris had sent me a few private messages about this, but now we're dealing with the public forum as well, I see. Good. Much better.

First of all, how did you FIND me, Timaris? When we had this online feud a few months back it was on Facebook using my non-Latervian name. How did you find yourself in the Fortress of Solitude? Did you.. did you GOOGLE yourself, Tamaris? Or did "ignorant black guy with chip on his shoulder for no fucking reason" come up with this page as well?

Anyway, we've went through this on here, and as I've said many times before on here, I don't give a shit what colour you are, it's how you act in life and online that counts. You want to jump to a knee jerk reaction of "racist!" because someone dares disagree with you? It's a cheap trick and you're a cowardly asshole for hiding behind it. It doesn't matter if you're black, brown, white or a "not very blight" Smurf, you needlessly call people a racist? You attack teenagers and get put in jail? Then that makes you a piece of shit.

And, no, sorry, but I haven't been in jail before. Sorry about that. I guess that's because my parents actually did a good job of raising me so I don't go around accusing strangers on the internet and beating up people in real life. It's called Not Being Scum. You should try it sometime.

So, no, I won't add your idiot son on my Facebook page, and frankly I'd forgotten he'd even existed, so quite WHY this whole thing is getting dragged up again is beyond me. Has he ran out of crimes to commit?