|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 11, 2007 11:14:08 GMT 2
 Worse than No Doubt AND Bush.I know, I know - I never thought it possible either, that Gwen Stefani could produce something more awful than anything her (ex?) band No Doubt and reduced to house-husband Gavin Rosdale's band Bush ever could combined. Take No Doubt's attempts at reggae, their use of guitars and trumpets (together? Never good), take.. well, every Bush song ever recorded and "Hollaback Girl" is STILL a hundred times worse. Let's talk about WHY. First of all, that fake music thing I hate. If you've read any of my previous reviews (and if not, why not?) you'll know that if someone is singing something, even if they've written it or not, you've got to BELIEVE it. I mean, Aretha Franklin didn't write "Respect" (Otis Redding did), but when she sings it - you believe it. Not so with this, a laughable attempt at a football-chant soundalike. Here, Gwen tells us that "uh-huh, this my s**t" and "this s**t is bananas". And then helpfully spells out bananas, all under a "Hey Mickey" type repetitive drumbeat. Gwen attempts to sound a number of things.. a) 17 b) black c) "street" d) like she had any idea what the hell a "hollaback girl" actually WAS until someone told her a week before the song was written. She fails on all accounts. What she DOES come across as being is everything that, well, she is. A white, 35 year old rich married woman bringing in expensive young talent to help her sell albums. It's not only an unconvinving song, but a crass, ugly, tedious NOISE. But it has the word "s**t" repeated loads and loads of times, so of course it sold by the bucketload. Sigh and double sigh. I shudder to think what she'll come up with next to top it. Gwen Gangsta Rap? See Gwen Stefani: Hollaback Girl
www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AU-kAnB24I |
|
|
|
Post by InvisibleWolfMan on Apr 27, 2007 22:45:23 GMT 2
I think the beat of the song is addictive if you strip away alot of the noise. However, I agree with you on all accounts despite that.
I often wondered, why she kept repeating "It's my shit, It's my shit!" & "This shit is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!" I came to the conclusion it was her guilty conscious, telling us the truth about her song.
Personally, I blame the much over-hyped Pharrell Williams for this "banana" (and many others). He thinks he's the next Prince. He has in a short time released alot of crap...and I mean CRAP. And he's just emulating Prince...which is sad because "there can only be one."
Is it any wonder that Prince doesn't acknowledge him no matter how often he tells the press how he'd like to work with him? I think not. Prince has had a PLEATHORA of stuff released under his name and many other people he's worked with. But he has CLASS...clearly something Pharrell does NOT. Sure, not every SINGLE Prince song (sung by him or otherwise) is up to par, but at least Prince's failures are INTERESTING.
Pharrell's stuff just appeals to scum...and it smells of it, too.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 27, 2007 22:45:54 GMT 2
I have noticed Pharrel ALWAYS mentions how much he wants to work with Prince, but it does seem our Purple One just ain't biting. I think it's because he would never have anyone else produce his work.
Can you imagine it? "Uh.. yeah, Prince that was good but... I think it should sound.. gulp.. differently."
Our favourite egomaniac just wouldn't have any of it.
|
|
|
|
Post by InvisibleWolfMan on Apr 27, 2007 22:46:34 GMT 2
I remember watching an interview with him about his solo album and the person asked him:
You've worked with so many people, who's left that you haven't worked with but would really like to?
To which he replied:
Oh....let's see: **stares intently into the camera like a man possessed** Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, Prince, PrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrincePrince.... and uh, oh...did I mention PRINCE?
To quote Buzz Lightyear;
What a sad, strange little man.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 27, 2007 22:47:05 GMT 2
Hey man, I'm just glad someone "the kids" are into is giving the guy such high regard. Who knows, "the kids" may one day walk into a record store and say "oh - a Prince CD. I may well pick that up now." Thereby saving their souls from eternal damnation.
We can but hope.
|
|
|
|
Post by trashcanman on Apr 27, 2007 22:47:42 GMT 2
Brian Griffin said it best: "I don't know what a hollaback girl is. All I know, is I want her dead." Not only is that song worse than No Doubt and Bush, it's the absolute worst thing ever. Worse than any film starring a rap star, worse than 9/11, worse than the love scene in "Howard the Duck", worse than the motherfuckin' holocaust, worse than Madonna's rapping. Okay, maybe that last one is a push, but you get my point. I can take a lot of musical punishment and come out unscathed, but this song touches me in all my bad places at once like a priest, camp counselor, and drunken hillbilly uncle all rolled into one and making me squeal like a pig, boy! Isn't Gwen Stefani, like pushing 40 or something? Grow up! I caught about 30 seconds of the music video once and was sujected to this middle-aged woman in a cheerleader outfit spelling out B-A-N-A-N-A-S. I also caught the beginning on a separate but equally painful occasion and she was surrounded by young black people, was dressed all "street", and (I think) driving a car on hydraulics or some idiotic shit. Possibly the most iconically retarded images that have ever scorched themselves onto my retinas. I feel dirty just discussing this piece of shit, I'm going to go take a shower and try to scrub away this shame, "Crying Game" style....
So, yeah, I really hate this song.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 27, 2007 22:48:15 GMT 2
"Worse than 9/11".
Posted on the anniversary of 9/11.
Ouch. Trashcanman - you have balls, my friend. Your bile and venom is a welcome asset to The Fortress.
|
|
|
|
Post by trashcanman on Apr 27, 2007 22:48:48 GMT 2
I didn't even realize that was 9/11! I'd been trying hard to ignore this 5th anniversary due to the fact that the media had been shoving it down our throats incessantly with made for tv movies, documentary specials, new footage from the "event", interviews with survivors and the whole lot. Irritating as hell. That was a horrible day in my life and I refuse to relive it over-and-over again just because the networks so desperately need ratings. Kind of the same way horribly untalented celebrities are shoved down my throat year 'round. I don't want to wallow in pity over 9/11 and I DON'T care what Kevin Federline and Britney Spears had for brunch. And yes, they show idiotic and pointless celebrity news both before and after the tear-jerking, dramatic 9/11 tributes. Too much for me to take.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 27, 2007 22:49:13 GMT 2
I watch WWE, and I was grimly imagining what OTT slush-fest they would bombard us with as Raw was on live on 9/11.
But no - it was fairly tasteful. A minute's silence (fair enough) and then the ring announcer sang the national anthem. By WWE standards, that's pretty tasteful, subtle stuff.
|
|
|
|
Post by Anna Marissa on Mar 31, 2008 11:22:17 GMT 2
ORIGINAL COMMENT FROM AMAZON.COM
This is one of the worst pop songs ever made!
|
|
|
|
Post by Benjamin Haines on Mar 31, 2008 16:26:35 GMT 2
Curmudgeon, you think maybe it might be worth the sacrifice to just not re-post every single comment Anna Marissa makes on your Amazon reviews? I understand the point behind importing comments from Amazon, but god damn. This girl's on you like Pharrell on Prince.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 1, 2008 8:19:40 GMT 2
Now THERE's an image.
Now now, Benjamin, that's not the attitude is it? We're supposed to encourage this sort of positive behaviour towards The Fortress. And besides, when I started I thought there was only about six or seven comments. She just .. I don't know, kept reading. What can I say? When you're hot, you're hot!
|
|
|
|
Post by trashcanman on Apr 1, 2008 11:29:58 GMT 2
Why not send her a Fortress invite? This place reeks of sausage. And God knows the girl's dedicated! Could be a fun addition.
|
|
|
|
Post by InvisibleWolfMan on Apr 1, 2008 11:33:31 GMT 2
|
|
|
|
Post by The Curmudgeon on Apr 1, 2008 21:34:06 GMT 2
This place reeks of sausage. Ladies and gentlemen - the NEW slogan for The Fortress of Solitude. Seriously, I actually HAVE invited her, but I posted it on those Amazon friend request things. But she hasn't actually responded to it. Hell, who reads those things? Benjamin still has one of my requests pending..! But yeah, I certainly wouldn't say no to some new blood around here. Couldn't hurt, right? |
|
.jpeg)
